Monthly Archives: January 2018

1/31/18: Without Shame

  As a child I would cry without shame Then as a man I’d build walls to stop the rain When my daddy died I threw my pain against the wind I couldn’t cry Couldn’t look within In my time Love Left me alone Look at my shadows Craving to atone Knowing now I only [...]

By | 2018-03-18T12:51:56+00:00 January 31st, 2018|Song Lyrics|Comments Off on 1/31/18: Without Shame

1/30/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part five, An Alternate Reality #3)

I’m going to begin my experience of meeting Jessica… by doing a little compare and contrast with meeting Marcy. Perhaps this will help me get a handle on it. Yea right... ---------------------------------------------- Self Image, Self Deception: Yesterday I began this exercise comparing and contrasting the experience of my two first online love attempt stories (as an [...]

By | 2018-02-03T20:23:10+00:00 January 30th, 2018|Memoirs|Comments Off on 1/30/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part five, An Alternate Reality #3)

1/29/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part five, An Alternate Reality #2)

What a man most wants from a woman, is to be able to see that she admires him. What a woman most wants from a man, is for her to be able to see him as admirable. ------------------------------------------- Going online, I found the above idea postulated, expounded and expanded upon by many authors, thinkers and [...]

By | 2018-02-18T21:21:38+00:00 January 29th, 2018|Memoirs|Comments Off on 1/29/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part five, An Alternate Reality #2)

1/28/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part five, An Alternate Reality #1)

There was proof that I had been there And proof I'd come and gone Imprinted in the sand's of time So why should I walk on Now and then identical Though never quite the same And future waves will erase both As if I never came -- Loudon Wainwright III ------------------------------------------------------ As I said in [...]

By | 2018-02-18T21:21:05+00:00 January 28th, 2018|Memoirs|Comments Off on 1/28/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part five, An Alternate Reality #1)

1/27/18: At Fifty

  Oh the people I remember In the stories that I tell Some be angels from my wildest dreams Others psycho freaks from hell I’ll avoid the histrionics I wouldn’t want to waste your time But each moment tends to foment More than my heart can keep inside Though I wasn’t born yesterday And my [...]

By | 2018-03-02T14:08:14+00:00 January 27th, 2018|Song Lyrics|Comments Off on 1/27/18: At Fifty

1/26/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part four, Unimagining)

We had both imagined such unreal visions of who we were meeting… ------------------------------------------- Of course I can only imagine, how Marcy had imagined me before that day. While planning the trip she'd seemed so excited, almost giddy. She told me of how her friends thought she was crazy for flying half-way round the world to [...]

By | 2018-02-03T20:20:35+00:00 January 26th, 2018|Memoirs|Comments Off on 1/26/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part four, Unimagining)

1/25/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part three, Reality?)

Three days of gazing into each other’s eyes and making plans for the rest of that day, the rest of her visit, the rest our lives…  ----------------------------------------------------- But the truth hit us like the proverbial ton of bricks. I was stunned. So was Marcy. From the moment we saw each other, it was obvious. We [...]

By | 2018-02-03T20:20:05+00:00 January 25th, 2018|Memoirs|Comments Off on 1/25/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part three, Reality?)

1/24/18: The Morning Practice (The Payoff)

  In this place I get to gush Show me how Together Blush? Acknowledge times not aware Boldly now Poetic Where? I found the payoff I found the payoff I found the payoff Random noise can not compete Inhale, two, three, four, five, six… Exhale, two, three, four, five, six… Inhale, two, three, four, five, [...]

By | 2018-02-18T21:18:29+00:00 January 24th, 2018|Random Awesomeness|Comments Off on 1/24/18: The Morning Practice (The Payoff)

1/23/18: Living With the Pain

  I’ve tried everything I could think to do Accessed every resource, even made up a few But all my efforts seem to have been in vain So I’m living with the pain The last time I sought relief I had some success Made me just a little over-confident I guess Still I wouldn't want to [...]

By | 2018-02-18T21:17:16+00:00 January 23rd, 2018|Song Lyrics|Comments Off on 1/23/18: Living With the Pain

1/22/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part two, I Imagine You)

I imagine you laying here beside me Feeling like it’s always been that way -------------------------------------------- In my car at the cell phone waiting area of the Honolulu airport. Waiting. Waiting for... Her! I look at my phone for the zillionth time since getting there, checking to be sure I didn't miss her call. She's going [...]

By | 2018-02-18T21:15:52+00:00 January 21st, 2018|Memoirs|Comments Off on 1/22/18: Looking for Love: Muddy, Meandering Paths to Myself (Part two, I Imagine You)