I’ve been trying to change the way I write the number 5
i’m not sure why
perhaps i feel i’m doing it wrong

for as long as i can remember, i’ve written five in one continuous motion
without ever lifting my pencil from the paper
i start at the top right and draw a horizontal line to the left
and then the line straight down
to finish with the bottom curve

i know that most people write five differently than i do
the way i’m now trying to

i have no memory of ever thinking about this before
or if i ever made my fives the normal way
the way they’re supposed to be made

i remember struggling with cursive in elementary school
but i don’t recall when it was that they stopped forcing me to try
it all comes back every time i have to write out a stupid check
stupid stupid stupid

i’d rather think my attempts at writing five differently now
is the result of some part of my creative mind
just playing around with form while understanding function

reliving past practice
refusing past shame


My Sweetheart Knows