Once upon a time
In a galaxy far far away
On a planet where the dominant life forms
All evolved
From peanuts…

Part one, The Great Roasting


“Nuts… “

“Dad, you mustn’t talk like that”

“My use of expletives is none of your concern Sonny. I’ll curse any old way I want thank you very much”

“Yea but mom said we need to… “

“Hey don’t you go and quote your mother to me boy. I know full well how she feels about our family’s situation here on this crazy world and how we got here so don’t you think you can lecture me on proper behavior now”

“I’m sorry dad, I’m just worried. I mean… just what are we gonna do?”

“Heh… we are going to do what we always do my boy, survive. This world is getting hot son, real hot and soon it’s not going to be possible for us to stay here anymore so I’ve made some arrangements”

“What kind of arrangements?”

“Oh hello sweetheart, I was just about to come in and give you the good news… I got us all a reservation on that great space pod thing you’ve been on about so adamantly. We’re all set to leave this doomed planet Tuesday next week. Now what do you two think of that eh?”

“That’s wonderful dear”

“The old man’s still got it”

“We’re leaving? Again? But I was just getting comfortable with this planet dad I mean geez what about my school, my friends my… what about Janeen?”

“This entire planet is toast my boy and so is your school. I’m sorry about your friends son but we won’t have room for them all in our part of the pod so they should have been making their own plans for this. It’s not like they didn’t know it was coming. Your girlfriend can come though if you want her to and if she wants… “

“Of course I want her to come with us”

“What about her family dear? Doesn’t Janeen deserve to be with her mom and dad? And she has a sister, you know”

“I know, I know mom geez I really haven’t thought about all this til now”

Perhaps it’ll be best for her to go with her own people. It’s going to be cramped enough as it is for us to try and squeeze into a spacecraft designed for all these… “

“They are not nuts dear, they are legumes”

“I was going to say goobers, isn’t that what they prefer to be called? Anyway they’re going to be roasted goobers if they haven’t made their plans yet or are among the fools who think it’s no big deal or can make it in the ocean… heh… boiled goobers for sure”

“Yes dear…
I know… goobers”


That’s all for now folks.
Stay tuned for part two

Goobers in space